Thursday, October 13, 2011

31 for 21 Day 13: Feeding Difficulties

I actually considered going back through all of my posts for the past 2+ years to see how many times I have talked, vented and cried through posts about Colin's feeding difficulties. Our biggest struggle to date is the fact that Colin doesn't have much of an appetite, he only eats limited foods (so limited I can count them on one hand), and that we haven't made any progress for a long time.
Chris and I have tried lots of avenues in order to overcome this challenge. We have read books, articles, tried tips from those experienced and not, taken Colin to 2 different feeding clinics, used a forceful feeding method, experimented with different textures, forced food, stepped back from methods, put Colin in front of the TV when eating, gone regularly to the feeding clinic while we are all evaluated, hid food in other foods, and on and on and on...

As Colin's personality and toddler-esque behaviors have emerged, the struggles have become more and more challenging. Chris and I come from families who have eaten many meals together around the dinner table and we have always done the same with Colin and now Kailey. However, there are nights where we want to pull our hair out (like tonight) where we sit there as Colin throws pieces on the floor, yells no, turns his head refuses to eat or drink because we just don't feel like fighting it anymore.

I don't think we ever expected to be spoon feeding 2 kids at the same time that are 2 years apart. Chris took Colin to the latest feeding appointment today and I think we are finally at the point that we are just going to back off for awhile. We don't leave there with a sense of relief or direction (except last visit for me because I thought I was headed somewhere) and also feel like things can't get much worse.

This challenge is really tough to deal with. We have literally been at this for over a year now (the feeding part) and it's not getting any easier. At. all.

Where do we go from here? Who knows...

...but we CAN say it's tiring and exhausting. We will keep trudging along, but hope that one of these days we can turn over a new leaf.

What we want? The simple pleasure of having our toddler feed himself , without a fight, and something more than what I can count on one hand.

11 comments:

Rochelle Cannon said...

Mealtime with feeding issues can be so frustrating. So sorry you guys are having to deal with it. Praying that the situation improves greatly!

Jenny said...

We are just now starting to have feeding issues. I have been meaning to do a post on it for so long now...

I have actually gone back in your blog and reread some of your feeding posts to see how you have tried dealing with it. So even though I hate that you guys are going through all this...I am really glad you are blogging about it Kelli cause I have picked up a few tips to try out with Russell :)

Anonymous said...

It will come! Sorry it is slow, but it will come!

Anonymous said...

It does sound exhausting. Owen lives on a few staples - rissotto (which I can sneak vege into), spagetti bolognese and bread. We find he is very interested in what we are eating and he loves to sit on our lap at meal times, it seems like he would love to try some but when we offer he growls at us and pushes our hand away, its enough for him to just see and smell the food. A friend of mine found she had to hold her little boy for him to eat anything and later she tried a weighted vest (and that helped too). thinking of you and colin
Viv - Owens mum

ch said...

Oh, our twinnie boys are twinnie stinkers at mealtime. You know you have my heart. Biggie is currently down to one food. Chee-tos. He also accepts sand, dirt, grass and tissue paper. Lots and lots of tissue paper. xoxoxo and sympathetic thoughts since I can't provide any personal success anecdotes. But you always know where to come for a nice glass of post-toddler feeding wine. xoxo

Jennie said...

Oh, Kelli. Please know you are not alone.

Chromosomally Enhanced said...

feeding is still a struggle for Maddie...her diet for awhile was cheetos and ice cream...and now it is mainly chabonni greek yogurt...I try to add veggie or fruits...but all I can do now is try to get as much nutrition in her as possible...sorry I have no advice...just now that I am feeling your frustration! smiles

Kelli said...

You are not alone. We do not look forward to meal times. Some times we look at each other hoping one will volunteer to help with feeding. The textures have come. I am greatful that for the most part we can feed her most everything we eat. The feeding herself part? I am still waiting for that day. I agree, I never thought I would still be feeding an almost 3 year old at the dinner table.

Bronwyn Shields said...

Ahhh, feeding. Our guy doesn't chew. Anything. We have to specially prepare all his food through a grinder. Fortunately, he'll eat a variety of food, except after he got his tonsils out he'll only eat yogurt or spaghetti. I'm hoping it's just a two year old jag he's on. God, what I'd give to be able to hand the kid a goldfish and have him not act like I'm trying to poison him.

jjpsmommy07 said...

Definitely not alone! Jonathon is almost 4.5 yrs and I am still feeding him. It has gotten better over the last year, but he still will not self feed 100%. Why? In my case I think he is lazy.....He can do it. he just refuses and well he knows I won't let him starve so he wins. You go thru so much to keep the weight on ya know......It is one of my main goals to work on. On the good side he is better than he was last year.

Wren said...

I have zero advice, just a big sympathetic hug!