Thursday, December 16, 2010

Challenges

I am happy to say that my mentality has changed in so many ways when it comes to working with Colin in accomplishing his skills. I used to worry so much about timelines and the fact that Colin wasn't doing certain things, but now I am much more patient...I am thankful for that.

However, there are challenges we face on a daily basis and that can be very frustrating. I am so happy to say that we have come a long way in the feeding department, but we also have a long ways to go. Nights like tonight really test my patience and I hope that a lot of it has to do with the fact he has two big molars coming in on the bottom. Colin now spits out what he doesn't want including all types of food (including food he likes, but will often finder a bigger chunk than what he likes) and the drinks he doesn't want to drink. Those initial feelings from back when Colin was only a few months old and wouldn't drink that much from the bottle are resurfacing because I worry that Colin isn't drinking enough in a day. I assume that if he were dehydrated, there would be signs, and since he isn't displaying any of those signs, I guess he is fine. However, even drinks he loves like yogurt milk are often spit out these days. When I say spit out, I mean forcefully out...We keep trudging along, but some days are certainly harder than others (especially when there is only a few things you can give your kid to eat!).

Another challenge we are currently facing is that Colin is getting frustrated at times with certain things and the only way he knows how to communicate those frustrations is through nonverbal cues. This means, yelling, crying, having a minor tantrum (I know his tantrums are nothing like what they could be), and on rare occassions, biting. I know that's part of the age, but sometimes I wish he was able to better communicate his needs to spare these types of activities.

We are currently "stalled out" when it comes to Colin's gross motor skills. He pulls to stand if he is in the right position and when it comes to something he is really interested in. However, when it comes to practicing his skills like standing, cruising, etc. he has no interest. I feel bad because when Miss Kathy asks if we worked on such and such skill, we often say no because we may try, but Colin fights us. The only thing I can say about this is that this has happened along the way when it has come to ever single major skill. When we were trying to get Colin to sit, he would force himself backwards because he didn't want to do it. When we tried to get him to crawl, he would roll over and sit up, and now when we try to get him to stand, he forces himself back down to sitting. I know that he will do it, it's just hard when you try to work on something on a regular basis and he just knows how to fight it.

I know a lot of these things are just things that kids do, but it can be challenging to face the same difficulties every. single. day. He will get there, but once awhile, I just need to get it off my chest...thanks for listening :)

7 comments:

Rochelle said...

Totally understand. He will get there but, you are right sometimes you wonder really how long is this going to take? I was just thinking this morning about when Alayna would chuck her utensil off the tray a million times a meal, that about did me in. Thankful that we are past that stage.
He will get there and the teeth do knock them all out of their normal routine. Hope they come in quickly and he is back in business.

JC said...

I am glad you posted this because I have been frustrated a little with Russell lately and his unwillingness to do things we are suppose to be doing right now...But I guess I just need to take a deep breath and wait it out, he will do everything eventually...Sometimes I just need to vent too, so I hear ya!! Its good to know others feel the same frustration I do at times.

Emily said...

I totally understand! Patience is a beautiful thing that I have had to learn as well...
Merry Christmas to your family!

Unknown said...

this is tough stuff!...Maddie will not work with me or chad but will with her older brother...I think kiddos know what gets us!! she will also do anything for chocolate and I am NOT above a good bribe!! Maddie has begun spitting also and will drink nothing but water...do you think it is a control thing?..that our kiddos see the control they have and are learning to use it...I think therapy is wonderful!! but with that said it is stressful..I am always feeling I am not doing enough!! Happy Holidays..smiles

Wren said...

I know it's not what you want to hear but it sounds like he's getting close to being 2! Some of the challenges are different because of the Ds, but the refusing to eat, spitting food/liquid out, biting, tantrums and yelling are all things you would be dealing with even without the Ds! He's testing the waters, seeing what's acceptable behavior and trying to have a little control. My niece is almost 2 and my sister posted her for sale on F.B. yesterday morning! In the course of an hour she bit my nephew, bro in law and this was after she dumped her plate of dinner on the floor...for the second time that night! It sounds to me like Colin is going through some pretty typical toddler behavior....albeit frustrating and nerve racking!

I haven't tried to hide the fact that I'm pretty relaxed when it comes to forcing Sutter to work on something he doesn't want to do. I think eventually they all figure it out and no matter how much we push or fight them. In my opinion it's only going to happen when they are ready. It's discouraging at times, it makes me sad to see Sutter struggle to do simple tasks that should come naturally and easy....but forcing him to do it only makes us both sad. Colin will cruise and walk when he's ready. There's a lot going on right now with Christmas and the other holiday festivities, he could just be overwhelmed by all of the excitement and newness of it all (it's not everyday we put trees in our house LOL). Maybe after life goes back to normal he will start working on those gross motor skills again!

Being a parent is the hardest job in the world and when you add Ds too the mix it just gets that much harder! Colin is doing great and couldn't be any cuter! That video of him in the bath is priceless....as we say at our house "cute cheeks"! :)

randy said...

Dear Kelli: I know my cyber hugs are NOT as good as Colin hugs - but never the less....I hear your "worry" and while you are trying your best to be level headed and realistic - remember in addition to Colin's efforts, struggles and little "attitude" issues - You are pregnant, working, etc...That is a lot on YOUR plate sweetie. Remember a time way back when and it seemed that you all hit the "brick wall" - well vacation time set in you took a step back and then Colin just zoomed forward. Maybe Colin is just ready for winter break? The worry, frustration, exhaustion is all reasonable and unavoidable especially with YOUR loving mommy's heart. Look back in your blog, enjoy the road to progress that ALL of you have traveled and then deligate Clean Up & Daddy Duty to Chris (he is amazing with Colin & you for that matter) - get a little extra personal TLC rest/time and hopefully the morning snuggle and maybe some drop clothes for meal time will lighten the "mood"...BIG HUGS and wishes that YOU give YOU a break - no one said any part of mommy duty would be easy -BUT you really are an awesome Mom and Colin and baby #2 are SO VERY lucky to have you and Chris as parents!

Kathy said...

Kelli, I too am glad you posted. I don't know what it is about reading each other's frustrations that makes us all feel better; that we're not alone. Evan just started with the spitting out food too, and good stuff. Things he loves. It's aggravating and I can't decide when to tell him knock it off or if his OT would say it's a good thing somehow. Either way, I think you are doing the best you can for him. Get it off your mind and then get back to doing what you can. I have times when I am supposed to z-vibe, feed him, let him help with the spoon, assist him with some attempt as self feeding (not) and it just is not happening. so i just feed him like i did before this all started and try to move on. funny how easy it is to give advice but when it's your own situation it is so much more difficult.
Anyway, you just keep venting if it helps and keep being such a great mom to that little cutie!