When we first had Colin, I thought getting pregnant again the 2nd time around would be completely different because even though not having children again really wasn't a plan of ours, I thought I would be laden with worry.
Sure, there have been a few times where I have been nervous when undergoing certain testing, or during the intial consultation, but I guess there really isn't much to worry about. Of course, we want a healthy baby, so there are the natural worries with that, but I don't think it's possible to ever have a pregnancy or child without worrying about something.
Because we "fell through the cracks" the 1st time around...meaning, we had all of the prenatal screening offered, but we didn't have any of the usual markers that you would find with a baby having DS, we have been monitored more closely this time around. We did have 1 "scare" early on with Colin where they found an echogenic cardiac focus on the heart so we were referred to a perinatal specialist. The specialist went through the anatomy of the heart, explained the function of the heart, and after thinking our baby had a cardiac problem, told us it was a marker for DS. However, he felt that he was pretty confident Colin didn't have DS because there were no other markers and our statistics were all coming back in a normal range. That day we went through a range of emotions, but the scared feeling eventually resolved because at our follow-up visit the doctor told us that the focus had resolved and "all was well" (we weren't a fan of his bedside manner).
So, this time around, we will be seeing a different perinatal specialist, just to have the Level II ultrasound . We really don't care either way to go, but I look at it as getting to see the baby more than normal (which I love doing). We turned down the amniocentisis because we know the results of it won't matter, and just opted for all of the normal screenings we had the 1st time around (which obviously didn't show anything anyway).
We do feel that some education is important, so as to prepare ourselves, and the baby, if the need was there due to health complications. However, we don't feel that for us, it is necessary to have the invasive testing because it isn't going to change our decision on bringing the baby into this world.
We are choosing to remain surprised about the gender (as we did for Colin) and this time around, we hope for the only surprise to be the gender (lol) although again, we will be prepared and ready to handle it if something else, like DS, were to come up.
To be honest, I worry more about the challenge of having 2 children as opposed to any medical issues. So far, everything has been great, and aside from some not so great nausea in the 1st trimester, I have been feeling pretty good. It is completely different the 2nd time around because I am so busy with Colin and a new job that time is going by much more quickly. In one of the ultrasounds that we were at, the baby was waving up a storm and I just felt like they were saying to me..."don't worry, everything is going to be ok". So in whatever capacity that means, we can't wait for baby #2 to get here :)
13 comments:
I am so excited for you and echo your emotions as I am also pregnant. We did the first trimester screening and then we'll get the level II ultrasound but no amnio, we just want to know in advance if there are any medical issues so we can be prepared, just like you. Colin is going to be such a great big brother!
Congrats Kelli!!! Not too long ago, I also had the same thoughts that you wrote about here. We also did the 1st trimester quad screening test but opted out of amnio and other invasive testing because we didn't feel it was necessary and it wasn't going to change our minds about whether we were going to have the baby or not. 4 months ago, a very healthy Elizabeth was born. She doesn't have DS but if she did, we would love her just the same. It is going to be a very big change adjusting from 1 to 2. Having my mom help me during the first 3 months helped, especially since Elizabeth was very colicky and fussy and she cried LOTS. She was either sleeping or cyring. It drove me nuts and wished she were more like the calmer baby that Matthew. Anyway, praying for a smooth pregnancy for you and healthy baby. How exciting that Colin will have a little bro/ sis.
It does seems to go faster with the 2nd pg and baby. It is such an awesome thing to witness the sibling love they will surely have for one another.
Sorry to hear about the nausea, hope it resolves quickly.
Can't wait to meet he/she...one thing IS for certain they will be one lucky baby coming into your family.
So excited for you!! Every pregnancy should be celebrated for itself. I know that your chances of having another child with Ds aren't really that great but at least now you have learned that you will love this child unconditionally whether it is typical or not. Of course I pray that you get to experience the life of a typical child as well. Hope you continue to feel better and better. I hated that early nausea. It seemed that once that passed, it was easy going. Give Colin a kiss for Ella.
That is so exciting! Don't worry about having two. It isn't that much harder, it takes a bit more coordination and patience. The greatest thing about having two is the confidence you gain as a mother.
Love the "surprise" factor....good for you!! I cannot wait to meet the newest Tobin=) Just think of all the wonderful memories that are about to be made!! Colin is going to be the BEST big brother!! Pregnancy really is different when you already have a little one. Much busier....and yes.....it really does go by quickly. Glad to hear the your nausea has subsided. I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes smoothly=)
Rest well, and invest in a good pair of roller blades, you are definitely going to need them! lol
I hope the Level II goes well for you! I get mine on Thursday and I'm so excited to see the little rascal again.
I second your fear about being how to handle 2 kids as opposed to the one we have. I don't have time now, how am I going to have time for another baby? I pray that Sweet Pea is kind to the new baby and that they become fast buddies!
Good luck and congrats again!
See the blessing these chromosomally enhanced little ones give us ... gifts of perspective and the knowledge that new life,all new life,is an absolute miracle.
2 is a magic number ,then again I have 6 and 6 is pretty awesome too.
Hi - worry is a mother's (and father's) RIGHT, priviledge and frankly a given (at least in my world)! And, worry doesn't discriminate between gender nor does it "come" with an age limit for parental worry expiration! Honest...continue to feel good - the best worry reducer while preparing and waiting for baby #2 is lots and lots of Colin snuggles, smiles and kissy faces!
kelli! i didn't know you were expecting!!! congrats:) whens the due date? having two kids is piece of cake, it will be so nice for colin to have that other sibling to play with, to grow with:) congrats again:)
i can't help but love this post kelli.
you are so right--enjoy your time being pregnant and leave the worrying up to the man upstairs. i am so excited for all of you!
There is nothing better then watching Max and Maddie play and love each other..you are in for such a treat...I still cry when I see the love between them...smiles and congrats...
We are so excited too!! Can't wait for the new little one! Love, Nana
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